Feeling sad n lonely

dun noe y every time at night feel so uneasy n hard to sleep also lonely n sad n most of the time like this i would feel like crying n keep on thinking of tings tat makes me sad or stress somethimes wonder m i being emo or jus seeking for attention or wat i also dun noe now i can write in my blog i can tell everyone who is reading this tat i really have a problem n i think no one can help. for those who noe me for ur info, yes i have a bf but when i m alone i feel really like crap sometimes i could even think of dying. i m really scared of being alone with no one around or talk to me i hate being alone i really really hate it i hate it so much tat i dun even mind being with a stranger, i jus dun wan to be alone n have no one to talk too. i m really scared oneday i may not be able to take the loneliness n jus end it n i dun have to think any more so simple i dun noe m i lazy or not or m i down to earth or not becoz this problem is really getting to me n i m almost to the point of really....... never mind haiz n yes i should look for a job. i should work n maybe it will help yes but onli when the sun is up when its at night no one can help me i m really scared of my life i have more bad times than good times i m really scared i really dun wan to continue my life i really hope tat my life can jus stop n this is not trying to run away or anything. i jus wan to say how i feel n wat i really wan to say becoz i will never tell this type of things to anybody becoz they will think i m crazy or jus being emo i dun wan ppl to say tat to me. it onli proves tat they dun noe me at all n wat i m telling now is the other side of me the ME tat u all have never seen before n now i m telling to my blog tat i m really scared tat i will not be normal anymore..................

sad wat ever

give u my love u dun wan sob sob sob hahahah ok la dun wan dun wan lor =P hahaha i tell u today i eat alot of thing lor me n mango eat pork ribs n fried chic cutlet lor eat till very full lor oh sorry mango never eat ribs becoz he say he dun like =P hahaha than u leh today wat have u been doing n did pin look for u after the birthday?

HAHAHA i knew it

heehee i noe u will noe how i feel bong heehee i love u hahhaha thanks for understanding this becoz this thing brings me down alot n make me feel llike shit some times but no choice becoz its the person i love haiz but thanks anyway u r the best....

Tired but happy

Not bad on yesterdays party abit tired n some small fight wif bf not overall not bad n i wan to say something i m very happy with the food but when i wake up jus now i realize i have sore inside my mouth than mango say i eat to much heaty food le (T.T) sian hahaha but ok la now much better yesterday night more jia lat but its worth it hahaha n pin pin hope u like the book i buy for u heehee n remember to name it ok heehee muack love u guys men heehee.

HAPPY HAPPY BRITHDAY PIN (THIS IS FOR U)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PIN HEEHEE 18 YEARS OLD LE WOR HEEHEE N CAN GO CLUBBING LIAO HAPPY MA? having BBQ for u happy ma hahaha u thave to really thanks bong n jia hui they really did alot for u but as for me u noe de la hor hahaha but i also got lor i go buy the cake de wor heehee hope later we will enjoy the party n i think i will go pray better becoz my place here wan rain liao if rain hor sure very sian one haiz but heehee its ur birthday today so it will turn out great hahaha n now is 2.25pm n the sky so black omg i better go pray now n hope it will not rain heehee okok

( T - T )

Y like tat i never thought i will turn out like this how come my frens have to tell me my bf is this type of person i m really sad to hear tat. Y can't they jus keep it to themself n not tell me so i will not be so stress about it, u noe like this next time i really dun wan to bring my bf along le becoz in ur eyes my bf is picky, stingy but u dun have to say it to me, i noe but i m trying very hard to cover tat u noe when u tell me this i feel so pai say u noe me well u should noe i still wan my face de haiz i feel like crap lor now i really dun wish to bring my bf any where we go anymore very sian lor i dun noe la haiz n my bf of mind hor also really the wat also la cannot blame my frens also so calculative de lor i noe dear u try to save $ but some times also mus sui bian abit cannot like this de if u like tat my frens next time also dun dare call me come out so both side of ppl u all r really putting me in a very hard spot help them cannot help u also cannot i reall dun noe wat to do lor so ppl spare me plz u all noe i dun like to be stress i have it from my family le i dun wish to have it from u all plz.

I ONLI SAID IN MY BLOG BECOZ I DUN NOE HOW TO TELL U ALL FACE TO FACE BECOZ ITS VERY HARD FOR ME.....(T-T)

SIAN early in the mornig

Haiz so early haven even wake up fully already had a small fight wif my BF sian lor n the worse thing is its the same problem again n dun worry its not becoz of money its cause by some other stuff haiz (-_-) wat ever la........ dun care.

Wat is this

Ppl nowadays really dun noe how to respact elders. haiz can really say it till like tat lor really dun give face lor wat is this haiz really have no eyes to see lor.

BUT WAT THE HACK HAPPY BIRTHDAY AH GONG (^-^)

MOST SICKENING DREAM EVER.......................!

Omg i can't believe i had this type of deam it took place in genting (which i m going on may ) me, my bf n some of my frens including kathy, we went to genting n the horror starts now my bf n kathy was so close together like they where in love n dun even bother about me even when they see me omg this dream sucks i can really feel the anger i really feel like killing the both of them in my dream never mind after that i called my bf in my dream, he jus treated it as if nothing happen tat pissme off even more n when he came back he did not even bother m i piss off becoz we where preparing to going drinking with some frens but after i prepare finish i realize kathy n my bf had already left together wif out me n those who tag along told me they hold hands together n left n suddenly my dream skip scenes after i realize the drinking thing was over n onli me n my bf was left in the hotel room i ask him but he jus answer me wif a look like there is nothing wrong so i piss off n said " IF ME AND KATHY CAN'T BE FRENS ANYMORE IT WILL BE ALL YOUR FUALT, I WILL PUSH ALL THE BLAME ON YOU " which i still remember which really made me piss off even when i m awake. so after saying tat i woke up feeling damn piss wif her n my bf omg so i called my bf jus now n told him, he jus told me its jus a dream, he said he will not fall for a gal like kathy becoz she is very rough n not girly but i still told him this dream will make me consider twice on going to the gening trip on may this is a sucky dream...............!

so early (-.-)zzZ

waking up so early feel so boring, dun noe wat to do now watching boring tv n hoping i can sleep again but i think its to late going back to sleep n also kind of stress rite now beocz i m thinking how to tell my boss tat i can,t work on tuesday n saturdayhaiz my boss is going to kill me men omg someone help me haiz (-.-)

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY

my valentines day hmm not bad lor onli jus abit sian becoz every where got alot ppl heehee but over all not bad, had dinner, movie n kind of romantic hahaha kind of ok heehee at night when home heehee oh n some thing happen while we where enjoying at marina square my BF told me a bitch saw me n my flowers gave a F***ing face hahaha wat the hell so wat i have a nice flowers hahaha n the movie when we reach there omg the line was so long so many ppl we had to watch the movie in the front row lor n we watch the benjamins button show a bit draggy but some parts r funny haha n we had my fav dessert mud pie SO NICE (^-^) heehee

My new hair cut...!

I cut my hair le hahaha come out not bad at all, the hair cut is really copy from the magazine n it did work those who say magazines hair is hard to maintan its not ture i manage it very well hahaha Y(^,^)Y

Oh i m getting a hair cut

Hahaha so scared dun noe wat type of hair cut they will pick for me (they means my fren n bf ) they will pick my hair cut hope i will not regret lor hahaha so those who read pray for me ok...

Hee hee now is my love life hahahaha.......

"Hee hee my love life my frens say i m a slut who change bf like changing clothes but its not true, but i m lazy to tell them its not ture becoz all my like i onli had 3 bf s no flings no ONS but wat the heck in their mind i m a bitch + slut so useless to explain but wat ever hahaha bitch, bitch lor =p haha. For my 1st bf well i never did lose to him becoz he never really put it in. but i was to scared to realise tat hahaha so i told my mum he did oops hahaha sorry n well i finally lost it to my 2nd bf but he dun believe so wat ever lor but in the end he cheated on me wat the hell is this men becoz i really felt the pain n for the first time i noe wat is call heart broken, wat the heck tsts life wat hahaha now my latest bf hahaha, my fren say he is the most good looking guy in whole love life hahahaha this is wat i think too heehee dear i love u n while he is the onli guy tat pretty much help me in my rainy days means in love n work both becoz when i broke up he was there, when i m jobless he gave me $$ to spend till i found a job tat was like a year (O.O) stone rite hahahaha also he help me look for jobs la n this n tat heehee oh n my fren kathy my best sister hahahaa though i every time take it for granted oops heehee sorry tell u about my frnes in the next post so wan to noe have to continue to read====>

Now to tell u about my life....!

Well my life pretty much sucks becoz my mum always reminds me tat i m a lazy person, tells me i m useless but its ok i m use to it, frens hmm they r so much better than we becoz they r hard working while i m not so they have been asking me what u wan to do in ur futhure but i really dun noe or should i say i m running away from life this is wat they( frens ) tell me so i think my like is crapy. n yes i noe some ppl r worse but in my story my i m the worse ok. i have been wasting my life for almost 4 years doing nothing, onli working as a waitress(partime) n keep on changing job from time to time, becoz i m most of the time late for work if not MIA meaning missing in action hahaha but tats me, tats y they say i m not responsabile but wat ever i dun really care though this is a very very bad thing, i did try to change, some how it never change haiz.... Never mind, my $$ some times i have some times i dun i jus use wat i have so means i dun really care wather i have anot heehee so this is my life for the past few years.......

Newbie

Hahaha i m starting my new blog today, hope i can manage it well heehee hmm wat should i write now i also dun noe. Ppl writes about life but i dun wish to do tat so i guess i will write something bad about ppl hahahaha BITCHY AGAIN sorry hahaha okok i guess i also write about life lor n add some BITCH somethings about ppl ok so those who got bitch dun get piss wif me ok hahaha becoz if i bitch about u means it really piss me off ok.